Epistle–Mary L.

Flipping Pages

A silent friend
but full of words
you invited me in
with a story.

I came back to you
time and time
you opened your door.

I cried over your tale
but your makeup ran instead
a permanent mark
on your skin.

I’m sorry I left
but I’ve come back
so won’t you tell me
your story?

6 Responses to "Epistle–Mary L."

  • I like this. It’s got a quiet sweetness. I think it’d even benefit from being expanded and exploring what you set up in the last stanza, that the speaker left this book and now they are coming back. Why? Hinting more at the back story might allow for more emotional exploration. And on a smaller note, I think the first lines would read more interestingly without the “but”.

    1 Sarah said this (November 27, 2012 at 1:46 am)

  • I like poems about books, and this poem is really well done. It seems almost whimsical and child-like, it reminds me of how when I was a kid I would read the same books over and over again, and it would be like coming back to an old friend. I think you could improve on this poem by expanding and fleshing it out a bit, and maybe giving it some depth. Maybe the book could be a metaphor for a former lover?

    2 jlupia said this (November 26, 2012 at 10:12 pm)

  • I really liked this! I think if you expanded on the emotions you described in the third stanza, it would give your poem a little more depth. I also think you could do a lot more with your title- after reading your poem it doesn’t seem like you’re simply flipping pages, it sounds like theres a bigger connection, so maybe try to capture that! Good job!

    3 carly15 said this (November 25, 2012 at 9:41 pm)

  • I really, really liked the second stanza. The way “again” applies to both lines 2 and 3 without repeating makes one stutter on reading, but I like the double meaning. It makes one reconsider the phrase and which way to read it, the same way one reconsiders parts of a book they thought they knew.

    Perhaps you should go more into why the speaker left the book. Did she get tired of the book? Was she simply finished? I think you’d do well to look at that some.

    4 Robert said this (November 25, 2012 at 9:39 pm)

  • I very much liked your poem, but the second stanza doesn’t quite make sense (it feels like there’s something missing).

    5 manetheren said this (November 24, 2012 at 10:13 pm)

  • I really like this–especially how you can evoke emotion with a relatively short poem! I like the oxymoron in the first two lines; it draws me in. I think that the word “again” on its own line seems a bit awkward, though.

    6 csmccarry said this (November 24, 2012 at 10:06 pm)